In today's Metro

This is a photo taken from today's Metro.

The article is about the riots in Egypt and the photo depicts a young man throwing rocks. The rock in his hand was not the first thing I noticed about this photo.

NOWHERE in the article does it even attempt to explain why this man's jeans are around his knees. That is poor journalism, Metro.

I have come up with a few theories:

1. The most obvious is that young Amenhotep here (I've decided that is a good Egyption name for him - it was, after all the name of a pharoah or two...or maybe three?) decided to follow the trend set by Western youngsters of wearing their trousers halfway down their bums, and it all went a bit wrong.
2. Amenhotep, while reading his favourite newspaper, perhaps the Metro, on the bog (also explains the scarf around his face) suddenly hears a commotion and calls for a riot coming from outside. Never one to miss out on a riot, especially one where you get to throw stones at police AND have a handy deputy pass ammo to you, Amenhotep hurriedly pulls up his underpants, slips his feet into flip flops and rushes outside to hurl rocks, realising too late that he'd forgotten to pull his trousers up too.
3. Nefertari, Amenhotep's mother, accidentally put his jeans in a hot hot wash, shrinking them. Not being able to go out to buy new ones after the curfew imposed by the government, Amenhotep demonstrates his dissatisfaction by wearing the now tiny jeans, which only come up to his knees, and throwing rocks.
4. Egypt is being taken over by a race of sadistic penguins who are making its citizens wear too-small jeans so that they start walking like them. Pretty soon all of Egypt will be waddling around like little flightless birds. Amenhotep casts the first stone in defiance.
5. Amenhotep makes a bet with his younger sister that One Direction would never gain popularity in Egypt. He lost and got to wear her jeans as forfeit. Embarrassed and angry, he starts throwing rocks at the band members. Others start joining in.

 Any more theories are welcome!

Les Miserable

Imagine a world where you had to sing everything you said. This is the world of Tom Hooper's Les Mis. No talking, just singing. Yes, singing singing singing all the way! Watching Russell Crowe and Hugh Jackman having a heated conversation in song was just a bit weird, but I must've got used to the song-versations as subsequent scenes felt less awkward for me.


My opinion, in short, is that it is a very well done movie, but do yourself a favour and go see the theatre production. It is miles better.


My biggest problem with this movie was the lack of vocal ability from Jackman and Crowe. Don't get me wrong, they would've been great had they been performing at a karaoke bar, but in a production such as this, they needed to be at a level far superior (take a leaf out of Anne Hathaway's book, gents). While Jackman's acting is superb as Valjean, and every emotion is evident on his face, captured in his close ups, I found his singing surprisingly average (given that he started out on stage - or so I hear - and that he has won lots of praise for his singing in this movie). I found both him and Crowe nasal at times. Crowe, on the other hand, gave the impression that he was playing a part in a movie. (Yes, I know, he was playing a part in a movie, but he's meant to make me believe that he is the guy he's playing, not merely going through the motions.) His singing was even worse than Jackman's, apart from his solo, Stars, which I thought was actually pretty good.


So what does make this a good movie? Solid acting and singing from most of the cast (exceptions already mentioned). Anne Hathaway deserves all the praise she has been getting for her portrayal of Fantine and for her version of I Dreamed a Dream, although I'm not sure Oscars should be handed out for 20 minutes of screen time...


Other stand out performances were from Eddie Redmayne as Marius, Samantha Barks (she of the teeny tiny waist) as Eponine and the little chappie who plays Gavroche (I'm too lazy to look up his name..). A saccharine Amanda Seyfried was passable as Cosette, although she doesn't have a lot to do except to exchange gooey-eyed looks with Marius.


Sacha Baron Cohen and Helena Bonham Carter were OTT right down to their ridiculous hair and costumes, but I really enjoyed the way the Master of the House sequence was done. How I wish I could thieve like that!


All in all this was a very good movie - as evidenced by all the sniffling women in the cinema afterwards, but if I lived in Tom Hooper's 19th century France, I would keep my mouth firmly shut for fear of bursting into song with every word I said.